Busiswa Gqulu's advice to women in abusive relationships

Busiswa Gqulu has a word of advice for women who are in abusive relationships. 

The 33-year-old believes the best thing to do is to walk away from the abuse. 

READ: Dealing with rape and sexual offences

Busiswa, who was also in an abusive relationship for years, says you don’t have to feel alone and keep silent. 

She says staying in an abusive relationship will rob you of enjoying the best that life has to offer. 

“One thing about my brothers on this app, they will DEFEND , JUSTIFY & NULLIFY ABUSE. YEYIII! If you’re in abusive relationship, I know it may feel like you’re on your own & have nowhere to go but please SPEAK UP & WALK AWAY. It’s not worth your life or Joy. You deserve JOY too,” she wrote on Twitter. 

In 2020, the ‘Uwrongo’ hitmaker spoke about how she suffered physical, emotional, psychological, and financial abuse for six years. 

“In years between 2013 and 2019  I was in, not one but two abusive relationships. The first was with Sfiso Mazibuko who abused me physically, psychologically, and emotionally. The second was with Katlego Mlangeni, who is the father of my child. He abused me physically, emotionally, financially, not only while we were in a relationship, but he also came after me four months after our break up to beat me up once again for seeing me out with someone else,” she said in an Instagram video. 

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Busiswa spoke about how she made excuses for the abuser.

“When I first got hit by a man, as in a man first laid his hand on me, my first thoughts were not anger but pitty. I was in love and I thought the person that I was in love with was going through some things and I felt I needed to help them get through those things. 

"I tried different things during the relationship. From therapy, anger management classes to the elders and prayer. I really thought that abuse is something you can get through with your partner.

“I'm here to say to ladies who are in abusive relationships or who'll ever come across that situation, God forbid. You can't. It's not your place, it's not your responsibility, it's not your job to change an abuser," she said. 

Watch the rest of the video below:

There are many organisations that can help abused women:

- People Opposed to Woman Abuse (Powa)

-Families South Africa (Famsa)

- Tears Foundation

- The Trauma Centre

- Thuthuzela Care Centres

Image courtesy of Instagram/ @BusiswaGqulu