Top three reasons why married couples are not sleeping together

Top three reasons why married couples are not having sexual intercourse

Does your marriage lack intimacy? This might be why...

Young couple on bed
Young couple on bed/ iStock

One of the exciting things about getting married is knowing that you will get to experience the rest of your life with someone you love. 

Marriage offers freedom when it comes to intimacy. It is where your sex life has got to thrive. 

It allows you to take the intimacy in your relationship to the next level. 

However, it looks like many couples are in sexless marriages. 

"It's been said that if you never wanna have sex again, get married." That was the opening statement of Maureen McGrath, a Registered Nurse, Sex Educator, and the author of 'Sex & Health' during a TEDX Talk

READ: Does intimacy affect sports performance?

She went on to explain that "most married couples have sex little bit more than once a week for the first decade of their marriage. It decreases after that." 

‌This is supported by an article in WebMD that cited a study published in 2019. It found that about 47% of married couples have sex less than once a week.‌

Another article by Healthline quoted Dr David Schnarch, PhD, who conducted a study with more than 20,000 couples. It found that 'only 26% of couples are hitting the once-a-week mark, with the majority of the respondents reporting sex only once or twice a month, or less'!

McGrath said: "There is a little-known chemical in the brain conveniently called PEA or 'PEA,' and it's responsible for the elation, the excitement, and the euphoria that you feel when you meet somebody that you are sexually interested in. This chemical is gorging through your blood vessels." 

"What happens after two years is that chemical diminishes as does sexual frequency. That's just about the time you might get married or may have conflict in your relationship," she added. 

McGrath also blamed the sex education that people get from a young age. 

"We teach girls and women that sex is dirty, and sex is bad, or it's overrated," she said. 

The author says young women are threatened with sexually transmitted infections and pregnancy out of wedlock. 

"This whole fear-base thing frightens women from enjoying sex, and we never talk about pleasure or orgasm with girls and women," she said. 

She adds that some women say orgasm is not important. 

However, she says the sex education we have for boys and men is different. 

She says the education mostly comes from internet pornography and it does nothing to teach men and boys about intimacy "which is really important to men and boys, or how to make love to anybody." 

Apart from sex education or the reduction in the PEA chemical, the author says women being expected to work in the corporate space and still take care of the home leads to them feeling tired.

Read more reasons that kill sexual intimacy in relationships here

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Image courtesy of iStock/ @dima_sidelnikov

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