Connie Ferguson on 3rd anniversary of Shona's passing
"Still feels unreal, but unreal has become our reality and we're living with it."
Actress Connie Ferguson is still mourning the death of her dear husband, Shona.
The actor took to Instagram to remember Shona on the third anniversary of his passing.
She shared a video showing Shona acting in some of the productions he has been a part of.
"One of one! There will never be another! A KING! A LEGEND! The GOAT!," she wrote.
The South African actress continued to talk about the pain she has been feeling since Shona's passing.
"Today marks three years since your departure my SKAT. Still feels unreal, but unreal has become our reality and we’re living with it," she wrote.
READ: Connie Ferguson shares moving birthday video of her late husband
Ferguson, who every year since Shona's passing shares her journey of mourning on social media, says her faith kept her strong.
"Our faith has carried us through the worst and we’re still here, thinking about you, missing you, remembering you, loving you and thanking God for all the beautiful memories shared together," she wrote.
"Death is not final, for as long as we remember you, you live!" she concluded her post.
Shona passed away on 30 July 2021 from COVID-19-related complications after spending a week in ICU at Milpark Hospital.
He was laid to rest at the Fourways Cemetery in Johannesburg on Wednesday, 4 August.
During his funeral, Connie gave a moving tribute where she described the love they shared.
READ: Connie Ferguson remembers Shona on their 20th anniversary
"I never, never anticipated where we are today," said Connie in an audio recording that was played at the funeral.
The award-winning actress says she always envisioned that the two of them would grow old together.
"God brought you into my life 20 years ago. I anticipated another 20 years with you. I really thought you and I are going to grow old together," she said.
She added that she remembers how they would see elderly couples walking hand in hand at Cresta Mall and "we would look at them and go, ‘look at us in a couple of years’.”
READ: Shona Ferguson lauded as loving husband, father at funeral
Connie spoke about the hard times she had when nursing Shona when he was sick.
"I nursed you for four weeks, 28 days to be specific," she said.
Connie added that Shona fought so hard while in hospital.
"I have never known anyone as strong as you Shon. How I saw you at the hospital, how you fought. Skat, I want you to know that I am so proud of you. Never known anyone with your fighting spirit. Even on that hospital bed, Skat, you defied the odds so many times," she said.
'The Queen' star spoke about the pain she is feeling.
"I am hurting right now, my heart is bleeding. I wasn't ready for you to go. The girls were not ready for you to go," she said.
Connie added how Shona's sickness made the family pray hard, believing that he would recover from the deadly virus.
"We have always been a praying family, but I don't think we have ever, ever prayed so much in our lives. We prayed and believed God for your healing and every time we went to see you we would pray with you, for you when you couldn't pray. Play worship, praise and worship songs and just believed, believed God for your healing. I think I'm beginning to understand that God heals differently. He may not always heal the way that we think," she said.
The mother of two says she can't imagine her life without Shona.
"I can't imagine my life without you Shon. The past couple of days have been almost like a dream, I still feel like I'm dreaming sometimes and that I'd wake up and none of this would be real. It will all just be a bad dream," she said.
READ: Celebrity widows give advice to Connie Ferguson
"One thing I do know for sure is that you walking with the Lord and that you have been preparing for this day all your life, all your life, because everything that you did my Skat, you did with a passion. Never known anyone as resilient as you.
"You have taught me so much my love. You taught me unconditional love. You've taught me to never just go one foot in. You are both feet in or you are not in at all. You were not one for half measures at all," said Connie.
She described her late husband as someone who loved hard.
"Anyone who's ever known you, will know that my husband loved hard, he loved hard, he cared hard, he worked hard, most importantly, he loved the Lord hard, unashamedly. It didn't matter who said what about you and your beliefs and your love for God and the Lord, you loved him anyway," she said.
"Babe, here is what you did for me and a lot of people that you may have not known while you were still alive.You have touched a lot of lives, you've touched a lot of lives Shon. You've taught people how to love, like families, you changed the narrative Shon," she said.
WATCH: Connie Ferguson and daughter show off their dance moves
The actress spoke about how they enjoyed a love that many people can only dream of.
"I may have only had 20 years with you Shona, but our 20 years, what you and I have had in 20 years, most people never get to experience a smidgen of that in their lifetime. How lucky am I? You loved me in a way that I didn't even know was possible to love. You had the God-kind of love, the God-kind of love. We say God is love, but we never allow ourselves to truly, truly just love and be, and you did that for me, for our children, for our family, and I'm realising for the community, for the nation, for anyone who knew you.
"I realise this is going to be a journey for me. That may be my journey is slightly different from what I had envisioned."
"God is still God. And although I'm confused right now. I don't know what tomorrow looks like for me without you because I just cannot imagine myself without you. I have to trust that God sees my pain and our children's pain.
"What I do know is that I am happy to have you as an angel, because I know that with God on my side, with Jesus on my side, and with you walking with Jesus, I have all I need to be okay eventually, " she said.
Lastly, Connie spoke about how her love for Shona will last forever.
"This is not goodbye, my love. Because a love like what you and I had does not die."
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